It's been long...

For those, who doesn't know, my comp had caught virus, i.e. no internet access. Contrary to how I would have reacted normally, this time round, I actually find this a bliss. This is the second trip down to the cybercafe and this one, smelt nicer than the previous one, thank goodness =) However, the trade off would be, background music of maplestory and chatters of primary school boys *roll eyes*, makes me feel old. >.<

As I'm blogging, my kid brother is just beside me. playing maple story, (which is on me). I bet, such a deal must have come as a surprise to him. I'm trying to be nice... at the expense of my pocket.. oh geez..

Days without internet access is really a blessing. I finally took time to read. Chick lit, classics and whatnots. Just the other day out, I bought three books!
"Paulo Coelho - The Alchemist" , "Meg Cabot - Size 14 is not fat either" and "Oscar's Wilde - Picture of Dorian Gray"
A truly therapeutic experience, to purchase all this books, and reading them. It's a good change to finally indulge in something I would like to read than what I need to read.

Besides reading, I also spent much time on my keyboard and guitar =) My two babies... but the guitar is not really mine.... Just the other night, chance upon Chopin's Nocturnes, and I find myself falling in love with it again. Should there be a chance, perhaps, I should learn more about Classical music too. I took some time off abe laboriel and friends and jazz, coz they simply reminds me of the whole A level mugging experience, of which... hmm....not a very nice feeling...haha... Hence music these days is just alot of praise and worship, justin timberlake.... oh wells...

Spiritually, it's really been wonderful journeying with God though the different ups and downs during this period. Not just, sending people around me to love me, his tangible presence also gave me peace and hope. I felt truely bless. And more importantly, God had place in me lofty visions and dreams, convictions that anchored me firmly to him. I shared it with my leaders and their encouragement, blesses my heart. Yes, it can be done.

My partnership with him.

And I say, HIS n HERS

Friends.

My A level results aint good.
Like how I shared with ruiz during our meet up, I screw it up.

Monday was a God blessed, I met up with two of my dearest friends, who really offered much support. Firstly, had TCC with Earth who is really sweet to initate the meet up just to make sure that I'm alright. I really enjoy meeting up with her, it seems like we have endless topics to talk and laugh about. I sure will look forward to other meet up with her =)

Meet up with ruiz, was initially a more serious one as we go through my options, of which, it's really not many. While the rest of meet up ended up with us irritating each other most of the time, I really do cherish this meet up with her. Coz both of us are so busy, it's not easy, to just meet up and stuff. After the meet up, really makes me reflect and realise how much she does cares for and trust me. And I think, all this would not be possible without God. Both of us had been hard to love for each other, but we did it anyway, ya? haha...

All this while, God had been so gracious to me, sending people around me, who loves and protects me. People whom I can trust and count on. All this, even when there are times that I'm rebellious or self centered. The way God is so gracious to me, I felt that I hadn't love him enough to deserve this. Of which, I know I really didn't.

Sometimes, I really feel that I haven't appreciate those around me enough. And I think I should really grow in this area. I must not take people for granted.

Hence, to the two friends who met up with me on Mon, I really appreaciate ya time and effort in meeting me. =)

Amazed*

You dance over me
While I am unaware
You sing all around
But I never hear the sound

Lord, I am indeed amaze by you and how you love me.

*His & Hers. ~Intangible touch, tangible presence.

Progess

Recently, I sense progress, both tangible and non tangible.

I'm glad I am making progresses in my keyboard lesson. And there's also somewhat of a progress in my guitar playing. haha. Felt more encouraged today, as I get more farmilar with the different chords of the D family on keyboard. Loads of hardwork needed to soar higher, but I know the lord is with me. This time round I must resolve to not be lazy. It's almost amusing to have one girl so amazed that I can play and sing at the same time, and she ask me how I can do it, teach her. I told her, I'm not naturally talented. I said, pray and practise. Yup. Actually I think I suck, but I really desire loads... =)

On the non tangible side, I saw I'm no longer that emotional wreck when things fall apart. And somehow, it's much easier to just simply go to him.

Few things that I'm looking forward to...

-Receving my a level result.
I've made plans for both good result and bad result.
Ideally I would like to get into NUS.
Should there be a plan B, personally I would really like to take a year off, to just meddle with things I like and figure out what I really want in life. Given a choice, I would like a year off to be expose to dance, more music lessons, more budget for books. A year, of simply just discovery and exposure, that would be lovely.

And suddenly plan B, sounds good.

But, on hindsight, going to NUS, will be better.
For practical reasons.
And also, I get to terrorise hammy chong *sniggers*
And, the good reason to shop for school bag and clothes!

For the better or for the worse, I will simply obey the direction that God will lead me. yups


- Second Module of keyboard lessons
While that would mean a time of crazy saving up (the lesson cost around 300bucks) and forgoing some bags, clothes and good food, it's all worthwhile. Developing this area of passion has already become a priority for me.
Oh man.. I have to once again postpone, my hair treatment and contact lens! Oh well, God will provide when he sees the need.

- NEE1 breaking 30
breaking 30 would signify a milestone, brand new dynamics, new people rising up. In the whole of my JC life, I have yet to see the JC girls group breaking 30. NEE1, jiayou!